The Lady In Red

Welcome to http://ladyinredskin.blogspot.com/. For my first entry, I contemplated doing a season recap, but as I pondered the idea, I decided it may be best to avoid having to re-examine the frustrating season. Personally speaking, that would only invoke futile memories of violently cursing my defenseless television. Instead, I think it’ll be more fun to take a look at our NFC East foes, and realize that relatively speaking, things in DC aren’t so bad.

First, we’ve got the Cowgirls. Frankly, they’re such an easy target, it almost takes the fun away from bashing them. On second thought, that’s not possible. Jerry Jones did us all a favor when he agreed to allow the NFL Network access to training camp, to produce the semi-reality show “Hard Knocks.” Really though, how many millionaires can be considered “hard knocks?” That point aside, even if they were ordinary middle class citizens, the fact remains they are some of the softest dudes to ever play the game. No, there’s nothing about TO crying on national TV over a lost game that I consider “hard.” Or how about Romo? No, there’s nothing “hard” about sun-baking in Cabo with a pina colada in hand a week prior to a crucial playoff game... and that’s not even factoring “chicken of the sea” Jessica Simpson into the equation. I’ll give it to them, Pacman’s a classless chauvinist, but there’s nothing hard about making it rain on women half his size. Jerry Jones has instilled his egotistical sense of entitlement into that team, and until they get rid of their circus clowns and get some leaders into that locker room, they’re hopeless.

Next, let’s look at the Big Blue. The New York Giants accomplished an amazing feat this season. They have set a new milestone in the history of the NFL. Yes ladies and gentlemen, we will always remember New York for having the Giant-est moron to ever step on the field. Congratulations, Plax. I still can’t think about this incident without laughing. A gun holstered in the waistband of your sweatbands? What were you thinking?

Finally, how about them birds? Honestly, I would love to see them offer Donnie that overly-generous contract he’s longing for. You really can’t help but laugh at the fact that after we walked into their city and embarrassed them, he had the nerve to stand up at the podium in the post-game press conference and declare that they were the supreme team. Did he still feel that way after we beat them again two months later? Sorry Philadelphia, but as long as you’ve got that delusional heatless clown steering your team, I just don’t foresee you bringing home your first Lombardi.

Undoubtedly, 2008 was a hard year for ‘skins fans to swallow. Yet, in comparison to our rivals in Dallas, Philadelphia, and New York, things aren’t quite as ugly as they could be. The fact of the matter is we’ve got a corps of talented and proven men to lead us into 2009, pending no senseless decisions made by the front office this offseason. If we can use the draft and free agency to acquire some strength on both our O and D lines, we will pose a real threat next year. So Vinny and Danny, please, for us Redskin faithful, try (and no excuses about how hard it will be) to act with some intelligence these next few months.